Sunday, April 4, 2010

Third letter to my baby

My dear child,
I'm in week 12 with you now, and from what I'm reading, you're getting bigger and bigger! I hear that you're about the size of a lime now, and I saw a "scale" picture of what you might look like in one of the pregnancy books I've got, and it's just so amazing to think how big and developed you are already! Granted by the time you can read these letters, it'll be amazing to us both to think of you as that small, but since right now you're just growing and growing inside me, it seems like an amazing feat!

You should never doubt that you're ours, that we love you, and that we want you. I love being able to dream about you growing, but I'll admit it's hard for me to imagine what might come next, both in this pregnancy, and in our lives together. I have to tell you, my mother is one of the sweetest ladies that I know, and one of the most precious relationships in my life. And it's crazy to think that I'm going to be that mama to someone else now. I think about the relationship that my mom has with her own mother, and how I love that, and even though I'm not that close to my Grandma myself, because of the great love my mom has for her, I always want to honor and love and respect that bond. And I think about the fun and the love and the bond that my own mother and I share, and I feel so lucky to be a part of this precious legacy of relationships. And so I hope that we'll be able to have that kind of relationship too. I don't know where it starts, because there's this whole thing of being a good mom and raising you well, and also of loving you well, and then of building a strong relationship. I guess I just want to say that I know we'll both make mistakes, but I will always be your mama, and I'll always love you.

I've had 2 dreams about you so far: I dreamt one night that I could feel you moving around in my belly, but when I woke up I laid really still to see if I could and I think it's just too early. And in the second dream, I dreamt that you were a boy! I can't wait to find out, not because boy or girl is important to me, but just because I want to know as much as I can about you, and to get to know you and who you might be already!

At times your dad and I have expressed that a lifetime isn't long enough to love each other enough, and I feel that way with you as well. Because I don't really know what I'm getting into with caring for a baby, I certainly don't want to rush things, but just so you know, I am so looking forward to finding out who you might be.

Lots of love,

1 comment:

  1. I love this!! I'm so glad you told me about your blog, because now I can be a regular follower. This is such a sweet letter to your little babe, something that he/she can keep and treasure. I'm so excited about sharing being mothers together, and being apart of this journey with you.